Guy1: Wasn't there some date today? There was something today...

Guy2: Yeah..there was something today...something gay...

Guy1: Something gay? Sure, dude! That can only be something to do with Lord of the Lost! Fanclub meeting.

Guy2: Oh yeah, sure! The fanclub meeting! I wonder what they're doing right now..

Guy1: I know exactly what they're doing.

 

(Intro)

 

[0:36]

Special: 1st meeting of the official Lord-of-the-Lost-Fanclub "Credo"

 

[0:46]

Chris: Welcome to TV Of the Lost Episode...

All: 300!

Groom: Episode 300.

Mandy (that's Mandy right?): Episode 300, our aniversary episode, of the fanclub meeting today, the first official fanclub meeting, in beautiful Hamburg, on the Feuerschiff (Fire Ship).

 

[1:00]

Class: This is the counter-wine.

Gared: By the time everyone has some, it's stale.

 

[1:05]

Chris: The problem is Class visited Darkhaus yesterday and went to bed at 5.

Class: Yes. But...

Chris: Gared too.

Gared: (hard to understand, but I think either he says "I continued till half past [???]" or possibly "I made out with half the bus")

Class: Gared and Kenny stayed up longer.

 

[1:15]

Daniela: This one won't open..

(It opens with an unimpressive sound)

Various people: Wow. Boring.

Chris: You could later add in a badass sound.

 

[1:40]

Chris: If you film nonstop now it will be full. Just saying..

Gared: I hope that all our 47198 likes show up today.

Chris: Of course..

Gared: That would make me very happy.

 

[2:05]

Class: It's going to be fun! Whee!

 

[2:09]

Gared: We are now going for a little...uh, no...a big harbour tour, right? A big harbour tour! Who doesn't know what that is, please ask your gastroenterologist! 

Chris: What is that a "gastro..."? Is that an innkeeper?

Gared: exactly...and that one always presses enter...or something like that...I hate my life...

 

<Bitch>

 

[2:27]

Gared: Do you know how to use a mic, Chris?

Chris: So... I'm really nervous, because I'm aloud to hold a microphone! *clearing throat* Have fun!!

 

[2:35]

Someone_1: Quite big..

Class: Yep, that's neat!

Someone_2: One marvels, the children discover a golden...

Someone_3: Yes, wicked!

 

[2:45]

Gared: For that you need the driving licences A, B and 3.

Class: Yep.

Someone: Holy fuck it's huge! As a known German band already said.

 

[2:53]

Someone: Do you need to puke?

Gared: All the time! Since this morning, continuously. I can't even eat as much as I have to puke.

 

[3:02]

Chris: We do have...Well, in one of our two most favourite pubs in Hamburg we always ask them to play one song and this is how it goes: "...."

*Chris sings, everyone claps*

 

[3:42]

Chris: You can send us pictures via facebook! Preferably in summerly outfits! And, uhm, *turning to the captain* you haven't said anything about the Elbphilharmonie! One can tell so much about that! Well...not me...but you for sure!

 

[3:57]

someone: you have to rub it gently.

Chris: Please keep some distance!

Class: Caution! 

Chris: Yeah

Class: I'm trying to aim...

Chris: Do I have to flex something??

Class: Nope, but wait...

 

[4:15]

Class: Hey, I shot up front! {?}

Chris: You always aim that good, when you should shoot at someones ass?

 

[4:20]

Gared: But first down the stairs.

Chris: But first through the tunnel! Not own the stairs and up the stairs. We have to get to that side. Go!

Gared: Bye! {?}

Class: Later we are going to be beneath everyone. {In German it's a pun for being in disfavour}

 

<Die Tomorrow>

 

[4:43]

Gared: And now we go! {?}

Chris: Look natural!

Someone: Very fast!

 

[4:55]

Rita: And we walk, and we walk....

 

<Die Tomorrow>

 

[5:03]

cameraman: And Gared how do you like it so far?

Gared: Well...After walking the stairs just now...I'm starting to wonder whether this was a good idea...No! It's cool and also nice. The typical weather of Hamburg...good music...

 

<Live Today>

 

[5:32]

Chris: Oh, we can?

Dani: Yes, of course!

Chris: Well, then we go!

Dani: That's what I said!

Class: Oh well, you did.

Chris: I would suggest we go | Dani: I said, we go now!

Gared: How about we go?

Class: Yes.

Someone2: You can also do whatever...

Chris: We take a taxi. 8km over the...

Child: I know what we do!!

 

<Die Tomorrow>

 

[5:56]

cameraman: And Class, are you playing lift operator today?

Class: Yep! Seems to tease me...

 

[6:06]

Class: Now everyone jump!

 

[6:10]

Chris: Who would have thought of that?

cameraman: Ulrike Goldmann?

Chris: Ulrike Goldmann! 

cameraman: Ulrike Goldmann, hello!

Chris: Ulrike Goldmann changed a bit over the past years.

Gared: But time will leave a trace at some point...uhm...

 

<Doomsday Disco>

 

[7:00]

Dani: We wanted to give you a little present. And what would you think? Maybe something you might need?

Chris: Food!

Class: Money!

Dani: Yes, we also thought of food, but {? can't clearly hear all of it}

Class: The leftovers from upstairs and nicely packed in a basket...

Dani: Finally we filled this small basket.

Gared: "small"

Dani: Here it is!

Chris: If in three years we will have to end our career because of alcoholism it's going to be entirely your fault!

 

[7:33]

Chris: Today we already got 4 bottles of whiskey plus this {talking about the gift basket} and maybe there is going to be more...we don't know.

Gared: Well now not anymore, after you said that.

 

[7:47]

Gared: Fancy!

*Chris poses with a bottle*

Gared: I thought to look a bit fancy with it.

*They all pose*

 

[7:54]

Gared: Oh no...

Chris: Gared ate some M&Ms. And they didn't look as if they would contain peanuts, but they did! 

Gared: As a whole.

Chris: We were in Dallas, in the hotel and I was taking a shower when Class knocked on the door and asked: "Chris, is it ok if Gared pukes he'll die otherwise"...

Gared: good guy... {?}

Chris: To the nuts.

Gared: Completely to the nuts {actually word by word: "fully on the nuts" which can mean something like full blow to the privates}

Chris: Thank you for being here, we love you guys!

 

[8:32]

Gared: Go away!

 

<Doomsday Disco>

 

[8:57]

Fan: Well honey?

Camera man: Do you like it here?

Fan: Yeees, it's nice. There's beer. I like beer.

 

[9:11]

Chris: Okay people...something...

Daniela: We wanted to play a little game now.

 

Class in flashback: It's going to be fun!

 

Daniela: Now one of them will start, and the other has to guess if it (the drink) was sweet or sour.

Chris' opponent: Sweet

Daniela: What, you guess sweet? (checks label)

Chris: Sour! :D

Someone: (to Chris' opponent) Go on, pokerface! You can do it!

(Chris' opponent drinks)

Chris: Sour.

Daniela: (Checks label) Yeah.

Chris: That was one tenth of a second.

 

[9:53]

(Gared drinks)

Gared's opponent: What was that now?

Gared: YOU have to guess that.

Gared's opponent: Sweet

(Daniela checks, he turns out to be right)

Daniela: You don't always have to make such a stone face. You can also try to mislead your opponent..

Gared: I did. I twitched my eyes. I thought he'd notice. But he's obviously not that sensitive.

Gared's opponent: I have to drink now..(?)

 

[10:22]

Gared: Quiet! Quiet! I have to concentrate.

Daniela: ??? (something about sweet or sour)

Gared's opponent: (takes a sip) Well?

Gared: You blew into it. You're supposed to swallow it.

(Opponent drinks)

Gared: Oh, that...oh now he mislead me. (pretends to spit)

Class: He doesn't like it (?)

Gared: ...um, sweet.

Daniela: (checks label) Sweet.

Gared: (victory pose) Worship and praise me!

 

[11:04]

(Class drinks)

Class' opponent: Sweet. Quite unambiguous, the way you look.

(They check the label, Class has won)

(Class' opponent takes a sip)

Class: I can't even see you. (Tilts head to look under the baseball cap. Opponent comes closer)

Class: Drink up. All at once

Class: Okay, that was sour

Daniela: (checks lable) Yes it was too.

Class: Yeah! I saw it.

 

<La Bomba, banana eating challenge>

 

[13:05]

Chris: Then it's the case that we want to move one. We are in St. Pauli..uhm...there aren't just boats...that's why we'll guide you to our favourite pub the "Gretel und Alfons"...

Some in the crowd: Oh no....

Gared: Oh yes!

Chris: We noticed that you also really like to party to Wolfgang Petry.

*Flashback to mentioned moment*

 

[13:35]

Chris: Everyone go pee. Put on your coats. At midnight we ride to St. Pauli to the "Gretel and Alfons".

 

<Credo>

 

Credits:

Special thanks to: Chris, Gared, Bo, Class and Tobi

Daniela Kuntze (organisation)

Mandy Privenau (photos)

Erik Niemeyer and Anne Him (camera)

Vanessa Meibaum (cut)

the nice Unzucht from next door for their funny video

the staff from the Feuerschiff

our captain and his trainee from Barkassen Meyer

 

[14:38]

Chris: I'll take duck hopping mad! (In German he's making a pun "stinksauer" instead of "süß-sauer" which would mean "sweet and sour")

 

(Some background talking)

 

Chris: Look cute!

fan: I can't look cute! That's my face, that doesn't work!

Chris: Look cute!

fan: How does that work?

Chris: Now you look desperate, look cute! ... that's not cute, that's sad. Look cute!

fan: I can't look cute!

Chris: Do like this! ... That's cute!

 

 

Translation: Manuela Lütolf, Jennifer Rudolph